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For you if you value relating happily & enhancing your freedom.


being in a Retreat circle that serves the highest potential of your humanity. Enquiry into relating, man-woman polarity & your sensual naturalness. With support from  fellow travellers, move beyond resistance, stories & concepts of yourself & others & embody more of the limitless potency, love & space you are. Feel deeply, explore, communicate, find pleasure, with ‘the other’ & with Life. Find the fullness of you as you relate, respond, receive.

continually recognising /understanding the differences between man & woman and the triggers that affect/hinder me in my relating with woman..untangling myself from  mainstream  conditioning & accepted customs and practices….valuing my own voice  in transformational work/ circles. I  particularly enjoyed the expression through movement…connection with emotions & allowing  feelings to be expressed fluidly. You do an excellent job ( both of you ) …I  enjoy you & Tim sharing some of your own experiences in relating ..it makes you and the work seem more accessible to me. A safe space with others who value truth and can also step outside of conventional ways of being. I especially value the  support in my relating life with woman…. so refreshing & replenishing ~ Mike Robinson, Notts.

such a valuable experience for deepening my understanding of myself and my husband, and our relating foibles.  It has encouraged and supported me to get in touch with deeper feelings and beliefs which I’d unconsciously avoided all my life, which misdirect my life and block free, open relating.  Joy’s keen insight and loving guidance was so very helpful in pulling unconscious traits to my consciousness, helping me sift through the jumble of feelings, beliefs, and misconceptions that I’ve gathered through the years, and seeing more clearly what is real. Witnessing other couples’ interactions gave me new insight into what loving behavior looks like -both of the other and of oneself. Witnessing their issues and how they are guided to respond informs my own behaviour.  It is a rich and intense milieu for growth, and I highly recommend it for anyone truly wishing to dismantle the maya and find one’s true self ~ Amy, Stroud

Being around a pretty conscious bunch of good men & women should provide a fertile zone of learning, listening & applying lessons. And so it was ! For me, that involved seeing how the “rough” part of myself affects my relationships, especially re women – all this has improved, for sure. I feel more at home in my life & am taking responsibility for my part in making it work well.  My shiatsu practice has gained from many factors including the confidence that emerged through the SG course & I have more clients now. Warmth..inspiring…richness…real intimacy…an adventure I have valued and gained deeply from. I thank you, Tim & Joy ~ Kalandar Warren, Stroud 

a huge thank you again .. beautiful.. so much learning. .. I feel blessed & empowered ~ Sabina Rademacher, Embercombe, now Portugal 

amazing how you present the most esoteric information & approaches simply & in a grounded way. Sex & Love will never be the same again for me ~ John Hitchin, Chichester

I have absolutely no doubt this will be a wonderful retreat,  do join us – and be amazed at what can happen! I was blown away by the level of connection, intimacy, courage, honesty and presence that I experienced – not to mention openings and healings that happened. It was powerful, and truly special ~ Rachel Irvine-Fortescue

Thank you so much for such a rich online retreat, it feels extraordinary… What Joy creates means that transformation can happen in an instant when and if people are willing and step into the potential that is there. The circles are full of love, deep insights and potent learnings, laughter and humanity. ‘Me’ and my life have changed immeasurably since beginning work with Joy. For much of my life, I have doubted love existed, now I feel I want to dedicate my life to growing it ~ Hettie

An ability to facilitate & hold a sacred space for areas of intimate relating & deep personal development that is rarely, if ever, offered elsewhere. Loved the feeling of safety & being held by the circle; the sense of wholeness felt by relating in a way, & with a depth, that is rarely possible in the usual course of living. A deep feeling of mutual trust, & the formation of close bonds within the circle. Offering the encouragement to step outside normal boundaries, thus facilitating change that might not otherwise have happened ~ Graham V., Bath


…your rich immersion into self-love, & love of life’s simple, ordinary miraculousness. An invitation to embrace what you meet in your relating, & find the joy in it. Real, simple, natural enquiry. This is world-class, leading edge, facilitation. Live more of your wholly integrated beingness & its fundamental archetypal energies, & explore how you ‘do you’ in your meetings with others. There may be dismantling of false veils of trance, apparent separation & old myths you no longer need. 

Enjoy a fusion of beauty, intimacy, innocence, realness, healing, love, enquiry, sensuality, authentic, nourishing community, depth, nature, & celebration of Life, as it is.


You get the right support, high quality reflection, dialogue, inspiration & deep explorations in committed community, to integrate body & soul. You learn to live so that hurt,  shadow, stuckness, judgement, fear, disappointment, loss, grief, fully received, brings you gifts as it dissolves.

Your relating life become more real, honest & supportive of who you naturally are. You can find clarity about your own & others’ true needs & vulnerability in your communication. Loneliness cracks open. Victimhood becomes empowerment. Patterns of being betrayer or betrayed are untangled & dissolve.

You transmute your past conditioning about love, gender & sexuality into simple naturalness.


If you are called to real transformation of your every day relating & you want to go ‘further’ than most can ever lead you, if you’re wondering whether to join us, see if these possibilities resonate….

Your life is already great, yet you sense there is more aliveness for you as a single man or woman, or between you as a couple. 

You wish to attract the ‘other’ who is ‘right’ for you

You lose your own truths & energetic integrity in relating

You wish to be free of the fear of abandonment which leads to muddy compromise or inability to commit

I realise that I am capable of intimacy – not in the future, but now, in how I relate to myself and others. I went into the group despondent about my ability to maintain intimacy (specifically in committed sexual relationship).  Even just writing that feels miraculous. Although I’m not looking for a relationship right now, I know that I am capable of intimacy, and will make a good partner. This is a massive shift for me. I find myself engaging more deeply with friends. When people brought relationship dynamics to the Circle, it has really helped me see wounded patterning more clearly in myself and others. It was always clear when someone was able to communicate from deeper than just their stories, with as much honesty & vulnerability as they could muster. It’s like a particular musical note, which I feel much more attuned to. Top quality healing & growth for the separate self, whilst all around the whisper that the separate self is not real. This Love-infused combination is pretty special. Joy: profoundly loving, profoundly insightful, funny, earthy. Penetrating insight combined with unconditional love. Tim: wonderfully human, wonderfully encouraging, funny, clean; a beautiful – road-tested – masculine light, full of love. The down-to-earth humour of you both is worth its weight in gold. I feel constantly, quietly, encouraged and celebrated through being part of the Secret Garden community. Joyful Loving was one of the best journeys I’ve ever been on in my life. I love your wisdom, your impeccability, your care, your skill, your funniness and your playfulness. Your commitment to us as a group was jaw-dropping (and I’m sure I don’t know half of the behind the scenes works that went in). Not just jaw-dropping – profoundly touching. Thanks from the bottom of my heart ~ Stephen Hancock, Devon

really appreciated the depth of connection & warmth…I have not experienced, not heard of work that covers such a unique combination of territory, so rooted in the body & yet so connected to spirit. And holding & allowing that space for people to see & work through their triggers & patterns – wonderful. beautiful, nourishing & enlightening. Since then, whilst I have been gathering the insights into the map in my psyche, how it impacts on my behaviour & relating, I have felt calmer, more grounded, more centred, more sensitive & open. More enjoyment of life in all its different, & sometimes difficult, colours ~  Hettie, Stroud

mulitple o’s… (never happened before) my ability to let go & experience the sensation-al ….made me feel fully alive, totally open (& vulnerable) & connected me to my open heart. Absolutely wonderful, truly transformational. Thank God for all I’ve learnt with Secret Garden & Joyful Loving especially ~ Susan C., Lancs

a benefit was getting clearer about what I want from my relating life. Overcoming and playing with my reluctance to challenge the other is probably the biggest gain. I feel clearer about what I want / don’t want in a broader sense too – in relation to work and other stuff ~ R.B., Bristol

Thank you both so much for that which is priceless, absolutely priceless Gold! ~Ashley Roberts, nr Bristol.

Joy’s words hit that fine sharp chord of truth, yet are full of love – a bit like a thousand butterfly wings beating upon you all at the same time. You think it’s going to hurt, but it doesn’t. I love that about Joy! 🙂 I participate with Joy for my own unravelling, rebuilding & development, & because I want to make a difference outside of me, in the world ~  Dawn Rising, Chichester

Join us for your profound, natural journey of waking up from separation in your relating life

…What will you experience?

You will  learn or enjoy and deepentrue, heart-felt, effective communication, the power of vulnerable honesty, transparency, friendship with ‘the other’. You will learn deeply to enjoy your desire for intimate contact, in all its moods, to receive deep pleasure & love, to know & honour your choices or boundaries in any situation. Your own awakening is the gift of every struggle you ever thought you had in relating – you will learn the hows.

You will explore the archetypal foundations of your unique being, & your masculine & feminine energy. You tune in deeply to male & female energy in nature. There will be a potentially life changing alchemical initiation. Such initiations catalyse the priming of mental, emotional & physical awakening, & also celebrate your unique being as man or woman. They are gateways to freedom, intimacy & naturalness. 

You are guided surely through profound shamanic ritual, ceremony, the most powerful meditations, guided structures,  shadow work, transpersonal & depth psychology – leading edge evolutionary work for awakened man & woman. You learn how to harness the breath to cultivate life force, & transmute raw sexual energy with consciousness & love into potent emotional & physical healing through the energetic circuitry of the body. You experience meditations in which the raw is transmuted & heart is ignited. In this life-affirming, profoundly rejuvenating work, there will be a constant transmission of the awakeness you are already, though the separate, conditioned self,  suffering & longing appear real. Compassionate holding & world-class facilitation bring revelation of sabotaging patterns & trances, & deep opening in love to all aspects of your own being, & to others. You discover the limitless potential you are. Creative possibilities, powerful intentionality & actions for ‘your’ life, aligned with life’s intelligence, can emerge naturally.

Sharing and touch

There will be sitting in silence, explorations in nature, spontaneous happenings, feedback structures, clarifying & energizing of your small & large intentions for living love.

There will be sharing in occasional gentle touch only if chosen. Rich non-touch options which allow distance are offerred on every occasion (your boundaries always clarified, & then communicated, first). You learn about esoteric energetic secrets – the art of loving must be learned, & is very rarely taught. Share verbally in pairs & small groups, to explore, mark & acknowledge, so that there is a deeper & deeper acceptance & love for the life that flows in you & the choices you make. More insights & openings happen the more you realise a willingness to embrace what is, now.

Every circumstance, every feeling, the natural rhythms of expansion & contraction, in life, becomes the perfect invitation to reclaim soul & heart & take you deeper, more alive. It is only when your whole being opens to sensation-al life, to natural eros, that the intimacy of not knowing – the presence of absence – arises & ‘you’ can fully receive the deep mysteries of waking up to the love beyond self. Revelation of the boundless intelligence of Life itself, the jewel of being, may occur.

The Power of Circles

The circle provides the safety in which extraordinary personal breakthroughs & undreamed of freedom as you relate becomes possible. The transmission of freedom that Joy is empowers realisations beyond the small, conditioned personal self, because there is no agenda. The ‘approach’ is dynamic & responsive; the exact content is determined according to the needs & energy of the group in the moment.

Open sharing in our large circle also opens your heart to the vulnerable humanity of self & others, & shows you what is in the way of that heart opening, catalysing a healing into deepening trust, confidence & sensitivity. The mystery of mirrors & the alchemical energetics of the present bring opportunity that simply isn’t possible in any other situation.

In the deeper Essence circle work, which may include dream work, ancestral (family lineage) healing, deep forgiveness work (self & others), you can, if you desire, release fixed attitudes & beliefs, for you & – if you are a parent – so your limits are not passed to your children. Your body, your feelings, your energy & your nature as man or woman is gradually freed of being run by the rejecting judgements, wounds, anxieties, assumptions & dilemmas you may have accumulated from your culture, parents, peers, partners & life’s challenges.

Being together in the circle, we open to the mystery, beyond the mind’s ability to comprehend, of all that happens among us, to life’s intelligence, that creates the deep insights & wondrous awakenings to the truth of who you really are.

Men’s and Women’s Circles

Men and women, you will spend some precious time separately with your own gender circle, sharing, & exploring gender-specific themes best explored in this safe space, which is so affirming of your manhood or your womanhood. The ideal of unisex dissolves & a new honesty & gender equality grows. Men are affirmed in their radical brotherhood into ever-growing power, heart & authority. Women in radical sisterhood find voice for their depth & sensitivity. Hurts & resentments are welcome too & compromises are seen for what they are. The conditioning is released that has kept the lid on the fullness of masculinity and femininity. In increased openness to this, openness to ‘other’ grows. Power struggle dissolves as each gender releases knots around control & being controlled. A drawing into the essence of gender can happen in shared initiations. Men & women can come to truly affirm their opposite gender so that both genders embody empowered masculine & feminine.


This circle supports conscious relating for couples if you choose to participate together & are committed to deepening your connection. Couples can be together in all structures, or whenever they choose. You will be facilitated through those obstacles, stories & limits which can habitually, often unwittingly, thwart your highest potential for self-realisation, mutual shared happiness & physical delight in your own being & with your partner. You learn how to clarify your shared boundaries, communicate & commit to them, & sometimes change them in line with shared truth.

Old survival patterns can lead to pain & difficulty in relationship, & sabotage intimacy. In this short video, Joy talks about some challenges for couples, & for all men & women. Challenges dissolve when you know how to fully embrace inner experience as your own, communicate in a real, vulnerable way, enhance energy, dive into presence & create infinite pleasure.


Re-kindle trust & intimacy. Re-awaken shared passion & aliveness. Melt into stillness & silence.


There will also be time to let go & relax, space to enjoy community & friendship, good food & music, celebrations, nature, dancing, & nature. There will be lots of humour & laughter!

A powerful circle is gathering already, in which deep nourishment & spiritual support can be found & where the beauty & power of your nature is mirrored back to you over & over again.

Give yourself the rare gift – a group gathering with the intention of their own & others’ freedom…Book now – places strictly limited.

Unconditional love in its highest expression, I never saw anything like it in my entire life…. This is too good to keep it secret. This work takes me completely out of my comfort zone. I embrace the fear & find my courage to continue…..more patience & understanding …I’m not trying to control (my husband) & that’s very impressive for me…I’m proud of myself! Joy has an incredible capacity to communicate, ask the right question or make the right suggestion to unravel what has been hidden. I accept myself more & feel empowered. My relationship with my husband has improved tremendously, as has that with my daughter. I feel happier & more fulfilled. The changes are sustainable. They last ~ Susana Jimenez Montalvo, Leicestershire

truly brilliant, almost too mindbogglingly simple to be believed! the best work I have come across. And Joy is the best communicator ever! …Clearly I can’t stop now…. living my life with that sort of sparkle and pleasure is something I did not imagine was possible… was beginning to doubt. And then this ~ Philip Batchelor, Stroud

Awesome…How good it feels to communicate innocently. Becoming aware of my own wounding so it didn’t need to run/ruin my life ….Learning to speak up.  Learning to say no. This work invites your fundamental core beliefs, projections, judgements and woundings into the light. Extraordinary facilitation will help you release trauma, receive the gold buried in your shadow and celebrate you, just as you are.  To be received and loved when you cannot even bear to look at yourself is profoundly healing.  If you are in any way attracted to this, just do it. Joy’s extraordinary facilitation and the innate intelligence of this potent work will carry your gentle being even when you feel you do not have the capacity to put one foot in front of the other  ~  Jemma Brett, Scotland

Dear friend,

I’m honoured you’re considering joining me for the Retreat. If that which cannot be spoken of, beyond the confusion of your conceptual mind, if diving deep into being, is something you value highly & wish to give some time and energy to, I invite you to take your place in this very special circle for a profound & tender shared journey. Human love is a theme which touch us all. I have known the pain of loss & divorce, & the power of opening, anyway. Relating continues to be the most important aspect of being human for Joy in the unfolding story – bringing so many gifts, riches & pleasures. I love to share what ‘I’ have learned, too. This circle will, wherever you are in your relating life & awakening journey, bring you increased clarity, fluidity & happiness.

When I first began my own awakening ‘journey’, I was just 7 years old. I never could have imagined where that & many more magnificent explosions into wonder would take me. In the final waking up phase of this story, I had the extraordinary privilege of receiving from two free beings & being apprenticed for 10 years to one of them. Pioneering work in the realm of consciousness & ancient wisdoms, while transmitting unconditional wholeness, has been a passion ever since. Sharing this Secret Garden, which is radical because it points direct to the root, to essence-ial nature – the core beyond story, thought & feeling, with anyone who is called to receive it – is an endless gift.

Some will not take this opportunity – these explorations are counter to every assumption of mainstream culture & the status quo of the mind – & will miss the joy, love & freedom beyond the personal that Is…Such is life! Yet it is clear; the evolutionary imperative for waking up out of the self-absorbed shell of the personality has never been so urgent; it is no longer a work for the few who leave the world to live in a monastery in the company of a spiritual master.

Sustainability on this planet must first arise from the individual’s surrender of self-ishness & re-learning of what is natural. For most, the re-activation of awakeness needs to occur repeatedly over several years, likely decades, to achieve stabilisation. Once fear & resistance are put aside, it becomes the ONE thing above all others in Life. This is the only sure foundation for cultural paradigms to change enough to make a real difference.

Since I began sharing these realisations with fellow lovers of truth & Life, I have been humbled & inspired to encounter generous human beings, so deeply dedicated to their own awakening.

This retreat circle is offered to you in case you have the courage, the inspiration, the love & care to be able to let go of your personality preferences and open to being, the vast nothing & everything. There can be a subtle & refined embodiment of essence, through which we humans are lived as the extraordinariness of the ordinary, the vulnerability that is our greatness, the mystery where nothing is known or certain, & yet life is infinitely creative and rich. This is the only trustworthy foundation for conscious relating, which heals & enlightens your body & being.

As dismantling happens, you can receive the uplifting, deeply nourishing company & awesome power of our community of men and women – yoga instructors, business owners, caregivers, artists, healers, lovers, teachers, writers, mums, dads, explorers of life’s truths – & its gifts of authenticity, deep trust, accountability, presence, intimacy, support & transparency.

The course content is all – new & cutting edge, so this group is highly appropriate for anyone who has attended Secret Garden before before (the depth of awakeness just gets better & deeper) & for those drawn for the first time. It gives you the spine of spiritual community to support you in conscious awake relating.

It is richly rewarding to be with those where the level of shared trust is so deep that the breakthroughs & openings can be far reaching, and a privilege to see what happens for people on a ground way beyond where they can go with most social & professional contacts, when they are willing to trust the intelligence of the depths, without agenda. Being with those who come to prioritise the integral unity of body & spirit, who respect the circle’s profoundly healing call for balance between individual needs & journeys unfolding, who love the surrender to male & female aliveness, love nature, clarity, the rhythms of simple pleasure, lots of belly laughter, deep exploration, silence, stillness, is – simply – joy.

If you decide to join me on this adventure, I so look forward to sharing this deep immersion with you. Join us & experience the repeated re-activation that you need to live a life of spiralling freedom, joy & illumination

With endless Love,

Joy Hicklin-Bailey

This group will fill fast so book now. We aim to give you exceptional gifts now & also profound insights and shifts which last for your lifetime if you act in alignment with them. This is a wonderful present for your loved one or yourself! (you receive couple/friend discounts)

If you join this circle now, you can just catch the early booking discount

How will you Benefit?

Transform Your Intimate Relationships 

Release Your Limiting Patterns

Developing skills for the art of living you

Healing your past

Discover how to co-operate with the enormous potential for healing, rejuvenation & evolutionary opportunity, built into the intelligence of the subtle energy body & the chakras

You rediscover the magic, the aliveness, the delight of your being

Live in your body

Live beyond separation and time

        • Release resistances, stories & hurts.

          Presence replaces separation patterns, longings & striving.

          You do not have to be run by your wounding.

          Discover that your life is not a problem to solve.

          Realise that Love heals the past, unwanted emotional responses, ‘issues’ & problems, so you get less entangled in new ones that arise.

Seize the day – give yourself world class facilitation here now book your place here before it’s gone

This group is right for you if…

If you value love, truth, silent awareness that embraces all, freedom, the beauty of what is simple & natural, intimate connection, the joy in being…if you value the rare accountability, vibrancy, depth & tenderness of authentic, awake community – this retreat is for you Book Your Place Now

If you love to live your wild soul, be broken open by another’s vulnerability, play, to say what you may never have dared, enjoy good company, love to be surprised, to find your edge, to celebrate being you.

If you are living less than the full passion & aliveness that you could be because of the roles you play, the routines, conventions & habits that restrict, if you spend too much time lost in your head and in virtual realities, save your one precious life!

Secret Garden is at the leading edge of our evolving humanity, for you if you are wishing for nourishment, for connection, for your power. Maybe you choose tender space to heal your heart, for support in transition or to enquire about a question about life, relating or spiritual awakening.

If you long…

      • To grow your heart big enough, beyond mind, to love all that is in others, yourself & life
      • To be able to tell truths to your partner & hear theirs, without drama or games
      • You intuit that relationships are perfectly designed to take you deeper in life, towards freedom.
      • Beingness is what really matters to you & wish for powerful transmission to dismantle what is in the way of that in the dance of relating
      • You sense the potency of awakened masculine & feminine, its creative, dynamic aliveness, beauty, purpose, passion & joy
      • You love, & sometimes long for more, truth, love & presence in relating
      • You wish to be with others in freedom, joy, pleasure & the ease of ‘You are me’
      • You are enquiring into the core questions of being human
      • You wish to never stop learning & expanding into what is simple, ordinary & natural
      • You wish for deeply satisfying sexual & sensual relating that open you beyond mere desire for gratification in the moment
      • You have had glimpses beyond the veil of the joy & wonder & long to fully embody beingness
      • For connection with others to be simple, direct & real
      • To explore subtle energetics & work with your sexual energy to empower your self-realisation
      • You feel really nervous, resistant & afraid of (yet drawn to) doing this course

If you are struggling at times…

      • You feel disconnected, know you could communicate more effectively – with friends, your partner or family – & miss the inspiration you used to have or that you long to have
      • Your relationship with your own body is less than kind or you feel unattractive sometimes
      • Your past family or love relationships have left you feeling burned or disappointed. You feel a need to protect your heart & are slow to trust
      • Have you spent your life so far trying to work out what not to do through your mistakes & maybe heartbreaking losses? Or have you compromised, or even given up or hardened yourself?
      • You are quick to judge others & also yourself
      • You feel emotionally blocked, stuck, or inadequate or play small in fear of others’ judgements
      • You regret past choices or actions
      • You’ve never felt really fulfilled & long for more pleasure & joy in life
      • You know you resist life’s inevitable intensity & weigh yourself down trying not to rock the boat. You intend to live co-empowerment but sometimes feel the tangles of co-dependency
      • You know you are not the body, your feelings, your own ‘map of the world’, yet don’t know how to break through the isolation & fear that is inevitable for the separate self
      • You sense fear, or old shame or guilt or old patterns hold you back from taking action & wish for freedom of choice instead
      • You feel your capacity for sexual or sensual pleasure is held in more than you wish
      • You long to break through the isolation, judgement & fear that is inevitable for the separate self & live the deep intelligence of the heart.

If you are single or in relationship

      • You are single & drawn to world-class transformational work
      • You are single & never seem to attract the right man or woman
      • You are with a partner & plan to attend together to enhance your individual & shared happiness
      • You & your partner are not sure whether to break up or move closer
      • You are in a committed partnership & wish to be in your own transformational space a while
      • You wish you & your partner to make love with exquisite consciousness

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve completed many retreats and trainings or whether you are just getting started in Secret Garden– you’ll learn how to take your embodied realisation of freedom & your life skills & wisdom deeper….. & live who you are even more effectively & on a grander scale!

Participants have experienced openings, healings, breakthroughs they had no idea were possible & had never touched in other spiritual, tantric & transformational groups.

      • How free are you of limiting projections about others?
      • How clearly do you communicate your needs, boundaries, feelings, what is of value to you?
      • How present & alive are you in your body?
      • How fully do you love & live the strong, clear, purposeful man you are or the radiant, powerful woman you are?
      • How freely does your life force flow?
      • Is your relating empowered & juicy?
      • Do you live all of you or do you live from the waist or neck up?
      • Are you ready to live awakened intimacy?Is this all-new group for you?
      • How open, vulnerable, not knowing & tender are you able to be?
      • How clearly do you communicate your needs, what is of value to you?
      • How present & vibrant are you in your body?
      • Have you touched the essence of who you are & wish to live that in all ways?
      • How fully do you live the strong, clear, purposeful man you are or the radiant, powerful woman you are?
      • Are you in friendship with your energy in all its colours? How freely does your life force flow?


Ask yourself honestly – were you taught the fundamentals of love & male-female energetics as you grew up?


If you ask, ‘Could love or life be any better for me?’ & answer ‘Yes!‘, then join this circle now, as places must be strictly limited for this.

Your profound work…how it allows & brings conscious light to areas of my relating I have struggled with for so many years, has and IS changing my life for the better! ❤️ ❤️ ~ Melanie Howard-Dobson, Painswick

I love the meetings. It is such a safe place to state your wants & needs, & to say no, without any judgement. You can be adventurous in many ways. It’s unconditional ~ Anthony, Bucks

liberating, transforming, rejuvenating, beautiful & revelatory for me. …. so relevant & transformative on many levels in your everyday life and in your perception of your experience & existence….Words can’t do it! I hope that you feel the gratitude, amazement and love I feel for you  ~  Susan S., London

Life’s Great Gift

The natural reality

beyond the mind is not of past or future, there is only unconditional freedom, always. Yet, to live embodied natural beingness, there must be a willingness to see the lies, the false identity that has driven ‘your’ life. How do you betray your nature? Trickiness loses its hold when clearly seen in an illumined field. The accountability & care of circle helps you come to love the one who wants to evade & escape this. You receive love you as clear seeing of what is ready to die comes. This is how ‘you’ take full responsibility for your life & learn to celebrate. As you live lighter the subtle direct experience of life’s empty fullness is enabled. This enriches every moment of relating.

The purpose of every step of this journey is to open you beyond the needy personality which sabotages your life – sometimes through surprise or new-ness in structures – into boundless heart-and-soul intelligence, the consciousness of presence to all of life happening endlessly now.  Join us on this journey of dismantling separate selfhood through heightening consciousness, then of unification, liberation into being.

Heal into Wholeness

Healing is yours, in full allowing of pain. Redemption is yours in for giving those who have hurt you. This being is the miracle. We must all birth into dualism & go through a period of conditioning into apparently limited, less than fully fulfilled humanity, to a greater or lesser degree. All experiences in later life that you might consider traumatic are always, also, a re-stimulation of earlier traumas, with parents &/or others. Unless you resolve these early events you cannot truly heal your current relationship life.  Fortunately these will be revealed in your present day life very accurately. In this training, you can access unconscious material from the past in a safely held way to enable deep healing work, around male & female, being nurtured, experiencing bodily pleasure, & more. You will also heal the cracks which life is revealing present-time. Any unfinished business & apparent obstacle arising out of this can be resolved so you may live free of any limiting effects & enjoy a rich maturation appropriate to your current life phase & chosen relating life. Transmute the lead of your conditioning into the gold of simple naturalness. This is the first step to a truly sustainable planet.

Deeper than the personality are archetypal energies – masculine & feminine energies, animus, anima, king, queen, lover, warrior, magician, & more. These must be clearly recognised, since when there is sabotaging unconscious identification with them, or denial, they distort natural balance, vital life force & relating happiness. This journey will vividly facilitate this crucial Jungian work.

The Body and Inner Marriage

Sensitivity to sensation-al life is invited Deep appreciation of the miracle of the body grows, & along with that cleaner instincts & heightened intuition – neither of these can thrive when the mind is in charge.

Kundalini – the surging life force which brings limits to the surface of awareness safely so they can be cleared – ignites in this powerful group field & develops in your body. You learn to conscious co-operate with this evolutionary momentum & build the skills & committment you need to keep your life aligned with it at all times. True creativity is unleashed. Your body tunes into male-female polarity in all nature. The contrasting energies in you, others & life are a delight, not a problem. Ultimately, the inner marriage of masculine & feminine is possible.

Human Intimacy

Deepen connection. If you are like most men & women, then you both crave & fear emotional & physical intimacy. There is so much more power in union, true making of love through the physical, conscious community & synthesis, than in individuality. Grow your transparency in heart truth, learn how loving ‘the other’ is a vital key to self-love. Share nourishing enlivenment in conscious touch if true to your boundaries. Acknowledge & fully embrace both your aloneness and your need to belong, and both your desire to receive love & the freedom of giving it.

Vulnerable, undefended being allows the possibility of direct experience of what is. The simple, easily missed or forgotten secret!

What if every single thought or feeling or experience or story were simply an invitation to love? Beyond judgement, opinion or resistance….what if there can be a choice whether to accept that invitation or not..a conscious no or yes…until there is no choice, & love is all, all is love.

Our Western culture’s emphasis on independent individualism often leads to a forgetting or rejection of the fact that mastery exists, that transmission is the surest way to waking up, & that you have the potential to be forever positively influenced by another human being. Joy’s deep pleasure is to work with those who truly value ‘the ordinary mystic’s work’ of awakening, integration & embodied realisation.


‘There is only wholly unconditional Love….Under what is, every thought, every feeling, every circumstance, however challenging, there is Love. Is – ness is Love – no-thing, everything – unfolding’ Joy Hicklin-Bailey


You won’t find such profound & real exploration into your human nature, & tender pointing to that which is beyond words, anywhere else.

What You Say

You see beyond the usual games, tricks, manipulations, patterns. You recognise the full scope of human challenges…You are my mentor, I trust you. You help me notice what is holding me back…Issues dissolve. There is always value, even if it isn’t the anticipated. You model aliveness, being, authenticity & natural ease. You are the best! ~ Katie B., Stroud

I am less frightened of men, I have more understanding of them and appreciation of their nobility, vulnerability & strength. I have learnt and healed so much from deep sharing with men, in paired structures and on the forum. I am beginning to enjoy my femininity, and finding, expressing and loving my softer, sensual, womanly self.  I am also much more aware of my unhealthy if not destructive patterns of relating in all intimate relationships, but particularly with men and on my way to changing them. I thought I had ‘missed the boat’ and would not get another chance at a relationship with a man, but I have much more openness, willingness & trust about that now. Sharing from gender circles – hearing both the men and women talk vulnerably, openly and honestly about themselves and the other….pair work and reflections on them…witnessing the courageous people who come with their partners speaking deeply, honestly, vulnerably to heal and sort things out between them. Listening to Joy & Tim talking about their relating with breathtaking truth and love. Every minute in circle and out of circle in this community has potential for deep learning. The informational learning about breath and body and archetypes in relation to relating, sensuality and s**uality was all really helpful. Anyone who takes the chance and dives in to being present, alive and speaking openly cannot fail to be impacted by what is on offer here. Then it is our choice how we take learnings about love, relating, being alive into our lives. The values of truth, love and depth are lived, and demonstrated by Joy & Tim. Exquisite, finely tuned facilitation by Joy on any matter – it is the only place where I feel all of me is truly accepted and where I trust the feedback I am given completely. Joy & Tim speak of and demonstrate simple and profound truths in a completely practical, down to earth way. Secret Garden helps me stay grounded & awake in my life by simultaneously facilitating me to live closer and closer to my nature whilst ensuring I take my self less and less seriously. Somehow, in ways I don’t understand I am clearer & stronger in how make more and more conscious choices about every aspect of my life and how I spend my energy and am simply more open to experiencing more of life. More open to joy and peace than before. And when the times come that are dark and ugly, (less often) they are ok too ~ H. Stroud

I have spent years now working with Joy, Secret Garden, Circles, (my wife & child), family and friends, knowing that I could perhaps move towards freedom by removing the outer layers I have created. Through this experience, I have finally seen my arrogance in judging that I might know anything about another when I don’t know the first thing about myself. This has felt so freeing, I now observe how I move in & out of well established patterns with an ever thinner disguise on. I used to say that this circle work saved my life but I now see it is my lifeIf there is more to do then I’m willing to do it. I want to live as true & in flow with life as I can & I feel that joining the circle is where I dread & what I love ~ Scott, Bristol

After 25 years of searching, I had given up thinking this taste of truth was possible. Even though aspects of my story go on, it makes me laugh now!  ~  Suzanne Bond, Bristol

You are a gorgeously juicy couple & your willingness to risk all to share your love & joy with us is profoundly inspiring. I’m living more of who I am…on my knees full of gratitude & love to you both. Challenging myself to be fully a man in the presence of a true woman ~ Robert Taylor, Australia

Given my entry point of the course – sudden homelessness & breakup of long term relationship, I’ve emerged strong, centred, remain open-hearted, with no baggage. Each module had immense value. all the human cycles were explored in safety & with love. With my whole heart I love Secret Garden & value the enormous opportunity it offers for both men & women. Each workshop becomes a bonding session for all who attend – brothers & sisters working together in a held safe place, supporting each other whilst working to reveal our own truths. I love Joy (& Tim). I am completely a student when I sit with Joy. It’s not just the integrity of the space she energetically holds, She is fierce, & fiercely loving. Whilst that may sound intimidating, for me, this is where trust rises, truth rises. No nonsense, no fluff. Crystalline words that bypass the mind & hit the heart. Tim is the perfect partner to Joy, offering his gentle yet strong, wise male counterpart – working in perfect exampling harmony. I know both the men & women in the group greatly appreciate Tim’s contribution that enhances the Secret Garden portal…it’s more than just an experience. It’s a portal in which one enters & pops out the another side, altered; life won’t quite be the same again!
How greatly loved & valued you are. I have been in many groups over many years – spiritual, personal development, shamanic. I have stopped looking for any other groups to feel family, maturity, inspiration, discernment & truth. Whilst there are other outlets I enjoy, Secret Garden is my top of the list, go-to for my personal & intimate enquiry ~  Dawn Rising, Chichester

As so often before you know how to say right kind & loving words. You are so real & human…I love your woman’s warm wisdom. You have a gift to make the other, me, to feel heard, that is a blessing. I ‘feel’ that you know what I try to share & where my words might fail you read with your heart. You have healing, reassuring & calming influence on me. Perfect balance of rigour & gentleness -seriously good but don’t take life seriously! I feel you have much going on & you still gave me time, your soft feminine warm heart that you are  ~  Heidi Ovarassi, London

 I feel that I have gained so much through you and Secret Garden work. I am eternally grateful for what you have shared with us; it is incredible to see where I was and where I am now. I will definitely continue on this journey and build on the wonderful learnings  ~ Tom Lowery, Stroud

Working with Joy has been very useful & rewarding for me, especially to reclaim myself as a sexual woman, to have permission to explore asking for what I would like & how to do that, to gain a much clearer understanding of the biological, energetic& psychological differences between men & women, all in safely held (though sometimes personally challenging) situations. Intimacy is a main focus of the work; it is never about performance but about presence, integrity, truth & honouring (self, especially). ..I have learned a lot of practical information & skills ~ Carole Clements, Bristol-on-Avon

deeply moved by these days. Since, as soon as I feel hurt I say to myself ‘let go of the fight, surrender, stop fighting, love the pain’. I’ve had 15 years of working with my Kundalini & I now realise I’ve been very male about it & forgotten the female. Thank you too, to Tim whose contribution I greatly appreciated, I feel as a man he brought a lot to the group & I’m grateful to him ~ David, Stroud

Secret Garden work is essential in my life as an ongoing thing…such quality I haven’t found anywhere else….You are so, so vigilant about constantly taking away from us our goals & ideals of becoming perfect or good & therefore deserving & loveable person we long to be (& already are!). I realised that I don’t expect perfection from myself anymore & therefore not from others, so now I don’t get disappointed or offended easily so I also don’t feel ‘tangled up in others’ in that exhausting way  ~  Surahbhi McMellahn, Ashburton

Unconditional love & integrity, consciously held in authentic community. ..it is beyond words ~ Alaistair Howard-Dobson, Painswick

Precious jewels…I was smiling at the magnificence of it all, delivered in such a humble, ordinary way!  ~  Rachel Irvine-Fortescue, Minchinhampton

Joy reads between the lines to get to the root of what limits me ..I am more confident, embodied, comfortable in my own skin. Joy has great love, truth & integrity. I will keep coming back because there is no one else out there  like her…unique….in working with her I design & build a life I could never have believed possible~  Kim Rossi, Notts

The info you share & explorations you facilitate so skilfully is GOLD DUST to a man who desires to be authentic, grounded and present with life, women and men. This is cutting-edge ~ Steve, I of Man

Being a part of Joy’s circle, held & fueled by immense love & attention, showed me healthy, open ways of relating with others which I had never experienced in my life. Everyone’s heart- & soul-life was honoured &protected, seen & strengthened, in a very conscious way. For me it was like stepping into a wonderland, somewhere vibrant with colour, life & feeling. It ever changed me. The encouragement & the safety in which I could explore myself in this new land was just what I needed to step out of the narrow thinking-box that was my life, into the sunshine. Secret Garden’s message speaks to my soul, my inner self who longs to be free & loved.
For me, the feminine side of life was sorely lacking, and Joy’s approach, while supported by the boundaried clarity of the masculine, is dripping with feminine tenderness & care which touches me so. I would rate the Ongoing Group 10/10. I would 10/10 recommend Secret Garden, to someone who isn’t so fearful that their unconscious fear would judge it as wrong or abnormal ~ Amy

Joy’s tenderness and presence helps you to explore your vulnerability with love & benefit from relief (of) resistance & pain &…dismantling illusions. Joy helps me find & face the truth, be more real. She can see what is behind the ‘problem’, helps me to welcome it, fully accept what is, let go & be freedom. This is huge for me-I used to resist it all ~ Alicia Ortiz, Andorra

Joy’s ability to help individuals & couples understand what real love & happiness is, is beyond expression. Her warmth, love, patience, courage & passion has forever imprinted itself on my relationship with myself & with others. If I could afford to double her fees, I would do that in a second. She is definitely the first person on my wedding list! ~ Fiona Campbell-Jackson, Bristol

Lifechanging, growing love & acceptance for myself, & therefore for others. I have a new trust in myself & in life, this may sound airy fairy but it is making real practical differences in my life on an everyday basis. I can let in & relish more light & pleasure when it comes, & when criticism, difficulty & challenge arise I can respond in a whole hearted way, rather than a fear based ‘as if my life depended on it way’. I am growing the ability to speak with truth from my heart. ..Not taking life so seriously… a new capacity to be vulnerable…A learning about, cherishing of & growing into being a woman, being feminine, being soft, being open…there is much more to do, but huge almost inexpressible gains have been made. A letting go of old stories of victimhood, of having to know & be right. A willingness a& openness to relating closely to others in groups or in community without paralysing fear. A new openness to sensual pleasure. I could go on …I love the circles – the depth of honest, vulnerable relating where there is the possibility of mysterious, powerful movements towards wholeness. The all encompassing experience of love – energetically & in practical ways & in the care & tenderness in relating to another in structures or in chats outside. The forum was an amazing resource to create new learning, continue to practice vulnerable relating, developing new understandings in the body as I witnessed others growth & development. The separate women’s & men’s times & circles, then the bringing together – huge insights into dynamics between man & woman. – a combination of deep healing of long held hurts & being shown a way to live life lightly & enjoy it in all its everything. Secret Garden meets & holds you wherever you are at, whatever your greater need or next developmental challenge you will be given tools, encouragement & love to meet it all, at the same time as being reminded our ’selves’ & everything we perceive is made up. The circle & community has depth, maturity & authenticity to hold me & everyone; it engenders true communication, allowing things to move & disappear, or come into being ~  Hettie, Stroud

If you are drawn, trust the call of your soul. Book Your Place in this Circle Here

If you have real questions, get answers Your Questions Answered by Joy here

We recognise you will have your own unique enquiry about this group & how it might relate to your life. We encourage you to reach out & allow us to support you in finding clarity about whether or not this is right for you. Call 01452 813241 or email if you have other questions.

You will receive these Benefits by Participating

Find practical details here

If you like the whole story go to this Introduction to this work and find out Is it for You?

Who will journey with you?

Those drawn to Secret Garden usually have maturity, sensitivity, self-responsibility, & rich life experience. You will meet men & women from every walk of life, businessmen & women, musicians, health workers, artists, coaches & trainers, doctors, actors, body workers, lawyers, parents, writers, careworkers, facilitators, counsellors, & much more, & often from several countries.

Most, young or older, will have already looked deeply into life & meditative practice. You are courageous explorers stepping out beyond what is known.

It is a wonderful gift, taking time out to hang out with people who love depth & authenticity & the freedom of being. The support, nourishment & confidence of being loved in all you are is priceless. Doubt about valuing what your heart knows dissolves.

How do you participate?

How you participate is totally up to you as long as you are respectful of all others.

A safely held exploration, this Circle is a tender & nurturing environment in which your vulnerability, privacy & confidentiality are protected at all times. (Photography & video is only used with those who have consented).

You are supported throughout in being in the structures & experiences in the way that feels true to you. Any sexual & gender orientation is welcome.

All your chosen boundaries in any presenting situation – which give you core foundations for this enquiry – are honoured & respected. No physical contact is an appropriate choice where right for you. You are safe & free to explore & find your freedom to be you, in love. You are asked to maintain the boundaries and confidentiality of all who are present.

Whatever your lifestyle choices, relating is something that touches you, all of us, through friends, family, colleagues & is welcome material in the circle.

This is truly rare, it is always new, and it ROCKS!

Join us now if you seek self-realisation or simply natural happiness.

Your Questions & Joy’s Responses

 What do you need to know to decide if this course is right for you? If you’re on the fence, wondering whether to jump into this gorgeous circle (& yes! there are many riches on the other side) here’s Joy’s responses to questions she’s been asked most, to help you decide.  We recognise that you will have your own unique enquiry about this group & how it might relate to your life. We also encourage you to reach out & allow us to support you in finding clarity about whether or not this is right for you now.

Does this approach really ‘work’?

YES! -many men & women have experienced this. Even I have been surprised by the total passion & moving transformational stories in the feedback I receive. Awakening work is not suitable for you if you feel or believe for whatever good reason you must stay in your present circumstances and mindset. Or if you feel and believe that inner transformation does not work –then it won’t.The impact of this work does, of course, depend on your willingness to follow the programme with totality & commit to taking actions aligned with new insights gathered & the openings you experience during the training – in your everyday, ordinary life. I share testimonials to reassure you that this is REAL, authentic & groundbreaking, cutting edge exploration, that WILL BENEFIT YOU, in your ordinary life

I feel really nervous, resistant & afraid of doing this course. Does that mean I shouldn’t do it? I’m not sure I’m ready…

Fear is the most common feeling – along with excitement – around real transformational work. We’ve had so many negative messages around living awake & being large, expanded, being sexually alive. This energy, plus healing into wholeness, peeling away trance, denial repression, is essential rocket fuel for happiness & for your transformational process. It’s all about baby steps… incremental progress with safe holding & clear reflection adds up to extraordinary, life-changing gain. When I’m facilitating groups around the world about ‘your’ evolutionary awakening, it’s often assumed that there is one glamorous answer or event in life that solves everything. There isn’t. Your belief in that will keep you stuck. You simply need high quality reflection, self-honesty, loving, awake community so you get loved just as you are & safe space – which you get in Secret Garden groups – so you can risk going beyond your comfort zone. Come because you have asked this question and because you feel fear. Learning to befriend your fears is one of the treasures offered by every Secret Garden circle. To be unsure whether you are ready, & that is an understandable feeling, nobody ever really is ready for transformation. The personality clings to what is known even when it is becoming too small. It really is best to trust your wish to come, especially if you tend to talk yourself out of your deep longings.

My life and loving is already great, what can this course do for me?

Embodied awakening work & spiritual practice is like yoga: the more you do it, the deeper & lighter you go. Some benefits are full-bodied orgasm, which can be used for spiritual practice, better health, & awakening fluid energetic flow in the chakra energetics, & creating an abundance of creative life opportunities by aligning life with truth

Men are no good, (or women drive me mad). What’s the point?

The best way to find out what’s in the way of love for you being in love with life & even being with your dream partner is to look inside with total self-honesty. The men & women in life & the circle are your exact mirror. As they become your perfect lover, your circumstances change for the good.

What about Couples?

You may be a couple who know you need to connect deeply in held space to break through habitual ways of seeing, conflicts & struggles, together.  You may have a partner who doesn’t share your passion for truth but supports your own lone exploration, because it increases the love you share. Or maybe you are a couple keen to serve each other deeply into spiritual awakening. It’s all welcome, including dynamics between you – the field looks after every outcome you bring. This group is focused on your own awakening & how that reveals ways to enhance the relating dream you create outside of you. Your increased aliveness, self-worth & love will help your relationship so much. And you will dive deep into love for everything you need to let go of & learn in order in order to be able to make love with absolute pristine consciousness. Aaah sweet surrender!

I’m single – will this course work for me? And can I come without a partner?

Yes! All Secret Garden workshops are suitable for both singles & couples. You can come with a friend who is acting as ‘your partner’ for the duration of the workshop, if you like, but it isn’t necessary to do that. The entire course is designed to work for you man or woman, either alone or with a partner, or for those who are in relationship but attend alone. And if you want a partner in your life, you are far more likely to attract the right one for you during or after this training! It’s likely if you are drawn to Secret Garden that you are looking to deepen your realisation of beingness, above all-and, there, there are no relationships! Just Love.

How much of your Most Intimate message is in this course?

This is a profound transmission. It is not directly The Most Intimate, because this is a course which necessarily addresses the (only apparent) claimed, separate identity & invites an opening beyond that. Its hidden context, its ground, is always The Most Intimate.

In the story, awakenings to & realisation of essence happen to people. This group facilitates & speeds that.

If you are intereted in non dual offerings, it may be worth saying that to pretend you are not longing to feel fully loved & able to be fully loving or for your ultimate freedom or can put worldly things first does you a disservice.

Am I too old / young to do this course?

No. Participants’ ages range from early twenties to seventies enrolled at the moment – awakeness & aliveness can grow & sensuality heals at any age. Whatever your age, nationality, walk of life, your uniqueness is warmly welcome.

What degree of intimacy is expected between participants? Do I have to remove my clothes or be intimate with people I don’t choose to be that way with?

It’s entirely up to you how close the contact with others is that you choose. Government guidelines if in place at the time will be upheld. You will always be invited to find your own true way, & sense for yourself how far you want to open, what feels good & right for you. Your own chosen boundaries about touch or not, clothing or not, will always be respected. The structured explorations, led by me & Tim, are essence-ial to a an awakened, true life for you as man or woman, ntended to invite exploration at depth. This course invites you safely & carefully into the Daoist and Tantric lovemaking practices & we are a couple who have a joint 40+ years of living that. You can participate in the whole training fully clothed & without any physical contact, if you wish, and receive full benefits and enjoyment. You will still be fully engaged & learning, healing & opening so much. This is, ultimately, a profound transmission of liberation & unconditional Love. Nevertheless, conscious relating & sexuality will be brought as a theme because knowledge of & friendship with these is crucial if your life force is to flow. Every choice is always yours.

I want to do this course, but I feel I may or will have to share with you something that I think is too strange or difficult to be heard

Nothing is too strange or difficult. Holding onto something all by yourself is lonely, stressful & unnecessary. You are welcome to share whatever you need to share so you can embrace this journey of integration & love. Your vulnerable, responsible honesty is others’ opportunity – to open their hearts wide! And know that how you participate is up to you, always as long as you respect the territory we share.

Is this safely held space? Will my boundaries be respected? Can I change them if I need or want to?

Please be assured that your boundaries are always sacrosanct and will always be respected. Your boundaries are likely to be different in each encounter & structure. Realising clarity about boundaries in any situation & learning to communicate them is a very important aspect of this Secret Garden (and life!). Consciousness of them & the capacity & willingness to communicate them is crucial in a life well-lived. You are asked to pay attention to and respect and maintain the boundaries and confidentiality of all who are present. You will need to be able to own and communicate your own feelings and have a willingness to be open and transparent. Please ask simply, responsibly and vulnerably for support where needed.

How will this course compare with others?

Most ‘transformational’ work & teachings in the new age & spiritual marketplace are superficial & give people a ‘high’ experience which is then not grounded. Much so-called healing & ‘awakening’ work, including mis-named non duality teaching that is available, is also very misguided, playing to people’s hope and pride & building up & reinforcing the identity rather than assisting in dismantling it. Nor does it assist people in the ruthless dismantling & integration required for true healing & wholeness. This is not a course that will appeal to ‘new-age seekers’. It is essential enquiry for those I love to  work – those who are sincerely committed to awakeness & consciousness in their lives & relating.

Why would I want to listen to others or relate to a whole group?

Being in the circle with totality is a meditation. Everything shared touches you in some way. Everything is your own invitation to dive deeper & be in love with existence, with life as it is. Let the life of the circle grow your heart wide open. The best way to find out what’s in the way of love & awakeness is to look inside with total self-honesty. The apparent others outside of you reliably point to your judgements & feelings which ask for your love & attention.

In turn you receive the power of the holding of a circle of committed fellow travellers. We need to be witnessed in our human beingness in order for pain to dissolve into the joy that always is, always was & ever shall be. The circle is your perfect mirror. It can become your perfect lover.

Shouldn’t I just wait until next time? Or try to meditate more at home?

Secret Garden gives you conscious community, as well as profound inner journeying. Healing is more powerful when experienced in a group. Wounds more often appear to be ’caused’ by others. So it is through others that we deeply heal mis-trust, separation, conflict. It is much safer to seem ‘sorted’, ‘together’ & to know who one is at a personality level, but that is all made up! When light & love increase, old pain can surface or strong emotions about unresolved current situations WILL come up yet easily dissolve if you are ready. As you move towards freedom & joy, it is INEVITABLE that in intimate relating such as in the circle, you will contact any unresolved shame, emptiness, hatred, judgements & not good enough-ness. Even though the stories of our pain are different, pain itself is collective & requires others’ mirroring, sometimes witnessing if you choose, &, above all, love, to allow you to dissolve past & trance fully. This is easier than you may think but requires great compassion from friends in the vibrant spiritual community you create in the circles, & great authenticity & self-honesty. Then, you have to integrate the learnings & TAKE ACTION, take small risks, be self-honest in ordinary life.

I don’t know how to relate-I always get it wrong & I’m not loveable

You are a human being. Evolution is natural & inbuilt – stronger than the negative messages you have been told or the limits you’ve taken on. I will guide you, answer your questions, above all love you, every step. The mind will never acknowledge gains & wishes to preserve the status quo, even if it’s your smallness. It will diminish the significance of breakthroughs in order to maintain its conditioned grip, because it feels ‘safer’. Co-operate with nature’s impulses & your suffering will decrease, ease & happiness will increase, Let others love you until self-love grows, sweetly & organically, self-love is the primary way we heal & align with life so that all else just gets so easy. Past patterning always get reflected back in your life precisely, until you find a guide to help you do the work of unpicking your limited map of reality. The mind plays many tricks along the way of the awakening journey. This training helps you see them, love them & let them go for good. I can’t help you if you refuse the help that is available; reach for the support for your freedom.

I have participated in other tantra workshops & retreats before – is this suitable for me?

This work & its energetics is continuously evolving. The format & content will be all-new. It has always been significant & valuable for every participant, & in many different ways – regardless of previous tantric experience or none of it. It is for you if you are seeking something richer, healthier, wiser & deeper than was offered by the sexual climate & attitudes towards man-woman & relating in which you were brought up. It is appropriate for everyone who comes with an openness to participating – in their own way – in an experience involving sensual structures which take into account our current circumstances with covid. People with previous experience of tantra work find a new depth & unexpected realisations & liberating discoveries in this training.

Perhaps it will hurt too much or rock my boat to start facing myself & others? Can’t cope with intensity.

It hurts a lot more not to! Others sense your pain even if you think you keep everything ‘together’. Unresolvedness will get mirrored back to you in your life in all sorts of unpredicted ways. Resistance to life & living weighs your being down. Life is intense if you don’t have conscious support & education about what helps you surf the waves.

I’ve never felt really fulfilled in love before – can this course help?

Yes! Through the level of trust & friendship that develops between circle participants, old patterns of separation dissolve. The structures bring specific opportunities to explore your limits to love deeply enough that they disappear. Men have learned & been amazed about things they’ve never known about women, themselves & love before. Women have now had their first o through doing the Joyful Loving course! & many find they deepen trust & bodily pleasure in ways they never dreamed of. You will have a new experience of relaxation & surrender into peak experiences & gradually everyday life becomes an ecstacy.

What can I expect will happen in this Retreat?

You will be expertly & almost invisibly guided into structures and experiences which allow you to feel life & your being more deeply than ordinary life might allow. The training includes pair work, small & large group processes; solo inner explorations  guided by Joy; dynamic meditations; circle work which gives you the opportunity to engage with Joy; occasional dance sessions; & you can expect some surprises, as what happens is guided not only by carefully planned structures, but also by the present needs of the participants & the group energetic.

I hope this helps you decide whether the course is right for you! We wish for you to make the right decision. Please email or call me if you aren’t sure about whether to join us.

Book Your Place Here Before They’ve Gone

Words can’t express the learnings I’ve had through you & the awakening that’s happened….the experience of life is so totally different from 18 months ago. I feel reborn, a different person. I’m more grateful than I can express ….. blissful … “I” was a swirling cloud of energy in a peaceful harmonious sea of perfection. (Yes I can’t find words to describe it!) Now I’m very peaceful about everything ~ Neal Thornton, Chiswick

Book WITH Mens or Womens


(book & pay in full by March 19th)  2 person and couple discounts can also apply

Book Here

Book by May 19th


(book & pay in full by May 19th)  2 person and couple discounts can also apply

Book Here

Book by May 25th – full fee


(book & pay in full before course)  2 person and couple discounts can also apply

Book Here


So join us now…..this surrender to the pleasure in Being, to the organic unison of your depths, sensuality & child spirit you can realise in Joyful Loving, brings the nectar of beauty, joy & soul in ‘your’ relating life

Will You Join Us?

This is your only chance to book at early booking prices! Jump & take advantage of this great window of opportunity before all course fees must rise.

Comparable retreats of this quality are often offered at three times the price.

Seize this rare opportunity. It will never come again, this way, or at this unique point in your life!

How much is exquisite expertise worth to you? How much is a loving, trustworthy guide – who has dedicated their whole life from childhood, to truth & love – worth to you?

How much is a clear mirror & mastery worth? How much is authentic community, dedicated to intentional enquiry & consciousness, worth to you?

This is a beautiful present for your loved one or yourself!

This group will fill fast so book now. Enrol now & bring world-class facilitation & support into your life.

If you’re feeling a YES, trust that soul call – you can.

Aloha. All love (Whichever side of the fence you end up on..;)),

Joy Hicklin-Bailey ❤️ ❤️ 

P.S Time to step up but you have to act now. This is your time. Join me now – I would love to be your awakening guide, to serve you to be the love you are so you can live an expanded life of beauty & joy.

You can do this – live the love you are. See you soon Book your place here

I have spent 15 years learning and reading about spiritual awakening, in these few days the truth of it unfolded for the first time. And life is so much better now! Thank you is inadequate ~ Sally Meadows, Guildford

Trust your pull to what cannot be spoken of

The quickest, surest way for you to heal into wholeness

Your relating shows you exactly where you limit your life. Enquiry & exploration in this arena is the quickest, surest way for you to heal into wholeness. Go deep, then light, with Joy Hicklin-Bailey. Joy’s approach is radical, this energetic transmission invites you directly to the root, to essential nature-the core beyond story, thought & feeling, over & over again. All problems & patterns dissolve then. It’s easy to get lost in your everyday demands  & challenges but research repeatedly shows that loving relationships are the absolute key to a life well lived. If you know this & yet have found out that your good intentions & trying are not enough, then this retreat is for you.

Love is always a risk. It brings loss. Problems & conditioned patterns take hold in the fear-based, illusory separate self. Through its challenges, and its joys, love initiates us into largeness. Discover how to co-operate with this evolutionary opportunity built into relationship. You will open where you have been stuck, un-nourished or fearful & in embracing the one solution, (there is only one), find a joy that doesn’t depend on anything outside of you, yet magnetises what is right for you.

Better relationships with others begin with a better relationship with ourselves & with life, otherwise we are continually unconsciously projecting our own wounds outside & getting a clear reflection of our unsorted problems – in relationships that do not fulfil our hearts’ desires! Avoid serious mistakes that can sabotage your life & which most men & women almost inevitably suffer from. Listening to life with Joy’s expert guidance & safe holding allows you to move beyond patterns into beingness, which brings you freshness, clarity & love. This is for both singles & couples who want more emotional & physical intimacy with future partners or their current partner & greater freedom in being.

Would you like your relating life, whatever your lifestyle, to be one of consciousness, tenderness, passion, pleasure, beauty & freedom?

Do you wish the healing power of truth, depth & presence to replace ambivalence, compromise & disappointment? This group is for you!

Heart-opening vulnerable relating is the gateway. Boundlessness is, always, anyway. This enquiry catalyses the natural evolutionary unfolding into wholeness, the potential for which is built into your physical & energetic body. Its ultimate expression is inner marriage – dissolution of all opposites into beingness, unity consciousness. To whatever degree it is realised, that deepens friendship & harmony between you & your lovers, partners, spouses, children, parents & friends, & all you meet. You will more deeply embody the love that is the essence of life.

Come live an expanded celebration of your humanity, the unique gifts of being you, the man or woman you are, with the stories you have lived & the life you are wishing to co-create.

Celebrate the vibrant, energetic being you are, enjoy consciousness & ease in your relating life…..act now!

The freedom dance of Being

Beyond experiences, beyond what is apparently happening, beyond emotions & judgements, is space, no-thing, vastness, endlessly expressing what is. The unconditional receiver of all the stories, is Love that allows everything to be exactly as it is, & dissolves all problems. ‘You’ are that boundless freedom.

Here’s what you can do…

The separate self cannot truly love. This Seret Garden is nothing to do with self-improvement or fixing anyone. It is about bringing consciousness into being, & relating. Profound opening to all that is, difficult or easy, beautiful or ugly, is key. Then Nature flowers in the human body, free of conditioning. Realisation that ‘you’ are Life itself, there is no separation, & that Love is the only ‘solution’ must then be stabilised in embodiment of awakeness. To the degree this happens, relating has more love in it. Separately, you can only ‘make yourself available’ for the freedom that is. As all that was believed in or felt collapses, a new possibility may – or not – emerge, of unification, of liberation into being. The mind cannot conceive that waking up & absolute freedom are not connected in any way. Secret Garden makes a clear distinction between these in this -in all – circles.

Your own waking up to the everything & nothing of life’s wholeness is the gift of every limit to love, struggle or unmet longing you ever thought you had in your relating life – this group invites you to discover how you discover & embody this. Are you ready, are you willing, to embrace all that is in life & love?

What if you come to embody the realisation that all you long for, all you seek in life & others, is yours already?

All you have to know about yourself is that you are willing to keep being here, total about opening & befriending all that you are and feel while continuing to engage.

An extraordinary adventure in self-realization. Life & love becomes a natural unfolding & ideology about how it should be falls away.

If you’re wondering whether or not to grab this rare, world-class, opportunity, and any of this resonates, trust the soul call –  book your place here

About Joy

Take the Road Less Travelled with Someone who Knows the Territory

Joy is currently writing a book with the working title

“Joyful Loving  – The Gateway to Being”


Joy Hicklin-Bailey is such a world – class, profoundly effective facilitator that several internationally renowned teachers & coaches go to her confidentially to solve their life & love issues, & go to her for supervision work.  Joy is a spiritual counsellor & an outstanding coach in the areas of natural happiness, intimate emotional & sexual relating, & professional development. Joy has been working with awakened embodiment coaching with individuals, couples & groups for over 20 years. In this group, Joy brings you her expertise in human dynamics & transformational evolution. She transmits the emergence of Self or beingness, for those who are drawn to wholeness & freedom. Joy’s clients come from all walks of life & include professionals, mothers, fathers, celebrities, farmers, artists, healers, & more. She works with immediacy, tenderness & utter clarity.

‘It’s beautiful, this witnessing of those I sit with finding aliveness, the natural flow of feelings, and what is beyond, the power & peace of a clear seeing of what is, in their ordinary lives & in what arises in the circles & sessions I have the privilege of facilitating.

Secret Garden points towards your ‘journey’ of awakening into embodied realisation of non-duality, of one, not two, into that which is beyond words. Whatever is – in the appearance – happening, the separate self’s hijacking of pure experience loses its hold & natural reality may be revealed.

Community, connection, presence, being, peace, intimacy, vulnerability, love, are beautiful gifts in the unfolding human story…. these are the qualities ‘I’ value & enjoy in the playshop of ‘my own’ life. My passion in Joyful Loving, Essence & Joyful Living events is an empowering of presence, awakeness, essence, from which comes natural power, joy, love & abundance. I love to see people shed the masks, armour & uniforms adopted in worldly activity or challenging relating, & come more & more to trust their nature, their deepest truth. That heals everything & then everything in the apparent story changes! Most of all, I love to share (directly in Most Intimate events & as transmission in other work) with those who are interested in exploring the natural reality of what is, unconditional love without cause, what cannot be sought, radiant being.

Since early childhood ‘I’ have experienced a series of spontaneous awakenings, in which the conditioned self dissolved, that have – in the apparent unfolding story that never was – lasted for longer & longer periods & radically transformed the experience of living on this beautiful planet into one of liberation, being.

The integration into ordinary life of this total surrender took many years. I only discuss this if asked – ‘spiritual’ experiences are simply that, experiences. What is, here, now, is ever changing & new – the stories are not the essence. In that ‘story’ that never was, I have been drawn to mystical & spiritual teachings since early childhood & I am very grateful to have worked with extraordinary teachers, indigenous & western. During this period, the energetic sense of a separate self completely & absolutely dissolved, leaving simply the wonder of what is.

Many years apprenticeship & training in healing & psychotherapeutic disciplines* grounded what was ‘experienced’ & gave ways in which liberated being could be offered in a safely held way in this garden dedicated to the blossoming of human beingness. The ‘approach’ is a sensing, feeling, seeing & listening to all that is apparently happening in the moment yet the mystery brings intuitive guidance. The intelligence of life plays immaculately & sometimes surprisingly. Silence & non-doing, rather than controlling what is happening with an agenda, allows apparent healing, magical unfolding & revelation of the wholeness beyond the appearance of form, identity & role – the wondrous gift of Life itself.

For over 20 years, there has been profound pleasure in & great gratitude for Secret Garden’s transformational weekend, day, week-long retreats, ongoing trainings & evening groups in Gloucestershire, Bristol, Bath, Somerset, Andalucia, Italy, the Greek islands & the Hawaiian islands, & one to one & couple sessions.‘

*Joy is a qualified, practising Jungian psychotherapist, & the founding facilitator of Essence work & Joyful Loving work. She is a hypnotherapist, a Huna healer, an expert in ancient lineage work with ancestors & family (the source of constellations work), Time Line therapist, NLP Master Practitioner & Trainer, & astrological counsellor. She is a highly regarded business/executive coach & trainer at management & director level in organisations such as Centrica & Aviva, several well-known charities, & more.

Just imagine what openings participating in this circle might lead you to…..places strictly limited

Practical details you need to know – dates, times, venues

Venue: Stroud and Slad Valley

Dates: Saturday, May 28th – Tuesday, May 31st

Times: Start at 10 45am Sat Close 3 15pm Tues

Accommodation: Non-residential Catering to incl 2 lunches 2 suppers & refreshments. Lovely Bed & Breakfast (double, single, camping) available if desired

Please see our Covid Policy and Terms and conditions

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