Joy talking with a circle and to a woman, after a challenge from a woman to one of the men. ‘Your rage against man and not getting what you thought you wanted is glorious -and not the truth. Your rage against man’s ability to let go more easily, his ability to be sexual without falling in love, his ability to stay relaxed, even empowered in a crazy, ‘too fast for feminine energy’ world is common. You also have your male. Find him and see. To be fully human, fully you (a woman), you must heal the wounded feminine aspects of being (which all women might or could do) AND then be alive to your male too (you dont have to act on all of it). And then you will see it is all innocent. it is simply energy. It is being. It is nature.
Can you joyfully love enough to acknowledge the pain of (this man’s) dilemma? knowing that growing and loving can have huge consequences, yet knowing one’s truth is to grow and love. This isn’t ‘fishy’ or immoral behaviour, it’s just ‘real’ life happening. Can you find the love for this and in doing so find the love for your own dilemmas, all of you? women, ALL the men here, can be your BEST FRIEND, learn from him, dont miss the opportunity. And allow him to learn from you too.
And women, yes believe me I know men’s behaviour can sometimes apparently hurt. But respect for men and their different journey and resources is the only way to be free. As long as you know in any conflict that the blurriness, rage, murkiness, hurt or wobbliness is yours, or at least are willing to be open to that possibility of it being yours, then it is ALL so welcome. In your willingness to own your pain you have the power to touch man’s heart and bring him to his knees in surrender to what is bigger than him.
All that can happen through your ownership woman, is, in the end, through healing, consciousness and resolution, more trust in your nature, a celebration of your choices ANYWAY, whatever they are, opening to more freedom and truth and clarity and an honouring of your tender hearts, men and women both.
I encourage you to be here without reference to anyone. If any of you hold back for others’ sakes here, you limit each other. It isn’t kind or generous, it’s a deal and it makes others small ‘I wont hurt you if you don’t hurt me’, ‘I will keep my mask on if you do’. Just keep being yourself here, allowing others to trust their darker shadows more and their shining truth more. Self-responsibility, full ownership is what makes it easier. It is safe to be you. Just make sure you see your blame and resentment of others for exactly what it is.
All of you, the mistakes must be yours. The choices must be yours. The consequences are yours. Made awake, not half asleep ideally! With a willingness to respect that in these circles you are all friends together in agreement that you are exploring. And good news the insights and openings are yours.
Sometimes the mistakes and conflicts take human beings far further than we can ever dream, I love the mistakes.
Secret Garden is not a dating agency. But there can be so much friendship here. and yes sometimes extraordinary love relationships blossom in these circles. It is a love and freedom agency!!!! Be willing to pay the fare of taking total responsibility and your Secret Garden can take you all the way to the destination you choose. Choose well and wide awake dear beloved ones.
Keep communicating, clear and unclear, loving and unloving. The more you show up here, the more you receive from life. You open to weave an even richer tapestry of love, being.
There is nothing to get – for your personality – from each other. And being together knowing that is everything. That is love’.